Monday, December 30, 2013

Preparing to be a Dad


Jeannine and I have spent a lot of time along the C&O canal over the years, and have had a lot of conversations about adoption while hiking that trail.  This weekend, while taking a walk along our favorite section of the trail, we started talking about how the whole adoption process has been preparing us to be parents. 


By this point in our lives, most of our friends have settled down and had at least one child.  I love it when it becomes “facebook official” and there is a cute post announcing that there is a new baby on the way.  My personal favorite is a picture of a family with the big-sibling-to-be saying, “I’m going to be a big sister/brother.”  Then for the next couple of months, there will be posts about how the mom-to-be is doing, as well as congratulatory posts and updates during the whole process.  You can always see what the new family is doing to get ready, and how the mom- and dad-to-be are changing to become parents.  It is great to see.  I love the happiness of my friends and rejoice when, after several months, I get to see cute baby pictures of their little ones. 


The process during our adoption journey has been a little different (although I am sure that I will be posting plenty of pictures when God blesses us with a child!).  There are no physical marks of pregnancy.  We do not have a set due date for which we can prepare.  At any time, we could get a call that could change our lives.  As slow as this whole process has been, when that time comes our lives will change in a flash.  So how do we prepare?  Well, I am a procrastinator (shocking, I know).  I mean, why do today what you can put off until tomorrow?  And since there are no physical signs, it is very easy to forget that this whole thing is real.  The classes were real.  The paperwork was real.  The child will be real.  But now what?  What is there to do?  What can I do to make sure that my future child has a safe and loving place in this world?  These are questions that have been on my mind.  


This is not the place for some big, “I’ve got it!” announcement.  I have not come up with anything that will shake the world.  I guess that I just have to remember that even though there is no physical pregnancy for Jeannine and me this is our time to prepare for the change that we are waiting for.  God is using the books that we are reading, the training classes we attended, and our interactions with friends and family who have children to teach us the things that we need to know to become parents.  I have so many friends at church who have new babies that I now know how to hold a child the right way (um, no, I have not learned how to change diapers yet).  Our friends who have adopted have shared parts of their journeys to encourage us.  The people I work with have asked and wanted to know how Jeannine and I are doing and if there are any updates.  And we keep moving forward and getting ready, mostly patiently, for the day when we can meet the child whom God is preparing for us to parent.


~Jason