It’s been a while since we last posted (over two months,
actually). I could say that it’s
because we’ve been busy – which is true.
But it’s also been a time of processing things and not being sure how to
write about them yet. It’s a weird
thing, this being in limbo thing.
Not bad, just weird.
Anyway, to catch you up briefly, here’s what’s been going
on since our last update:
Jeannine’s
switch to part-time work
I (Jeannine) have reduced my
hours at work, and am now only working four days each week. This was something I had talked about
with my bosses as a way to transition to more part-time work once we have a
child placed with us. Do we know
for sure that I plan on working part-time once we have a child? Nope. No idea – just taking it one day at a time and trying to
make reasonable plans in the meantime.
I’m loving having this extra day
off each week – I’ve been able to volunteer some of that time doing some other
types of work for my school, I’ve been able to take some of the load off of
Jason with things at home, I’ve been able to catch up with friends and spend
time helping people from church with various things, etc. It’s been great!
Dear
friends bring home a baby girl
Our dear friend from college and
her husband adopted a baby girl a few weeks ago. They live in another state where the laws are much different
than they are here in MD. In MD,
the birthparents can’t sign away their rights until the baby is born, and then
they have 30 days from the date of signing to change their minds. This means that the earliest we would
be able to bring a baby home would be at a month old. In our friends’ state, the birthparents can sign away their
rights before birth, and then only have 72 hours after birth to change their
minds. It was so exciting to hear
the news that our friends had gotten “the call” and were at the hospital with a
little girl. They asked for prayer
as, at the time of their email, there were still four hours to go until the 72
hours were up. It was good news
for them and they received the “all clear” that night.
Would you join us in praying for
them as they adjust to being parents?
Also, please pray for their daughter’s birthparents, that they would
experience emotional healing and that the Lord would surround them with a good
support system during this time of grief.
Some of our friends who knew
about this wondered if it was hard for us to watch our friends take their baby
home, especially because they got approved just a few months before we
did. God has really blessed us
through this, because both Jason and I can truly say that we were joyful for them
– there was no envy or bitterness or sadness on our part. I’m sure that as our process goes on
(our agency has warned us that we could have a wait of five years, after all),
we might experience these feelings as other friends adopt or have biological
children. For now, though, we are
at peace with waiting and are enjoying seeing our friends blessed with little
ones! This is truly a gift from
God, because (as Jason can testify), I am not an especially patient person. J
Waiting
families support group meetings
We’ve been to two support group
meetings that our agency facilitates.
We are required to attend two a year, and so far, they have been
worthwhile.
At the first one, a couple spoke
to us about their adoption journey.
They waited for just over five years for a placement, and adopted their
little boy in May. It was helpful,
but a bit daunting, to hear their perspective after such a long wait.
The second one was quite
interesting and encouraging. A
mother came and spoke about her experience with adoption – both as a
birthmother when she was younger, and now as the parent of two adopted
daughters. One of her children was
born in China and because of the way things work in China (birthmothers have to
anonymously give up their children because the law prohibits it), there is no
way to ever find out who her daughter’s birthmother is, let alone have any
contact with her. Her other
daughter, though, was born here in MD and they have ongoing contact (what is
known as an “open adoption”) with those birthparents. This mother’s perspective was wonderful, especially given
the complicated situation with her children (how do you explain to one child
that she can’t know her birthmother, but her sister gets to see her birthmother
several times a year) and with her experience as a birthmother herself. Fascinating, eye-opening, and
encouraging.
Building
new relationships
This past weekend, we had a
chance to meet up with another couple from our adoption training classes. We really hit it off with them during
our training classes and were thrilled to be able to continue that
relationship. We met for a casual
dinner and it was great to hear what they had been up to over the past couple
of months. When we started this
process, we didn’t anticipate making new friends through it, but we are really
blessed to have done so!
We’ll try to post again soon. One thing that we want to do is pick up on the series that we
started right before we got news that we were approved – regarding our
preferences for what we are looking for in a child. See our July 31st post, which was the first (and
so far, only) post in that series.
If you have specific questions about this topic, let us know so that we
can be sure to address those questions!
